Talk About Herpes | Herpes is not life ending

I`ve visited this site several times in the beginning, reading other`s experiences. When I first found out I was completely mortified and depressed. At 37, I`d only been in two relationships and with 3 men intimately. The diagnosis altered how I felt about myself and temporarily wrecked my self-esteem and confidence. I felt dirty, ashamed, outraged and simply…run down. I was in a relationship for 9 years (long distance) and despite his denials, it had to have come from him. I`d only been with him with the exception of almost 2 yrs prior when we broke up. I used a condom with that person and never ever had the issues that surfaced after I visited my boyfriend almost a year ago. Since we`ve been together so long, we didn`t use anything. While visiting, I began to feel a little sick, like the flu and on my flight back home I felt horrible. I called in sick from work the next day because I really thought I had the flu! then I thought I had a urinary tract infection – the first outbreak was the absolute worst!!! when I got the prognosis, I could not believe it and got re-tested. For a long time I thought my life would not be the same, that I was tainted and undesirable. I have a strong faith in God and prayed, talked to trusted friends and got educated. It`s been August 2010 when I got this and I take lysine and Red Marine Algae and basically, take yoga, exercise, pray and try to keep myself healthy. I had a small outbreak but nothing like the first! I know my long term boyfriend gave it to me because he still wanted to be with me. If there was any doubt, he would`ve definitely been livid. He sent me a "test" 8 months later to prove he didn`t have it. I`ve since learned to live with it. No one wants this but your life is NOT over at all! Rather, my love life has blossomed and bloomed! I met two wonderful men that really love me for me. I was up front and told them once I realized they were good people. Now, I have to choose between the two when I thought I`d never find love again. Part of me really loves my ex and sometimes, I want to be with him but he`s never come clean and I can`t trust that. My point in telling all this is that you can find love but you must first accept it and deal with it (herpes). Yes, it`s life altering but not life ending. It`s made me more aware of my own health and stress levels, it`s made me appreciate others and not sweat the small stuff. I`m living, laughing and loving…myself. [47486]

Gender: F
Age: 38
State: mo


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