Talk About Herpes | Cheated before Wedding


I was 25 five years old and engaged to be married when an X-girlfriend came over one night to congratulate me on my up and coming wedding. One thing led to another and before I knew it, we were having unprotected sex.

Well that was 16 years ago and so I don’t recall when the first outbreak
occurred but it wasn’t long after that encounter. Some time after I was married and my now X-wife also got herpes, but at the time neither one of knew what it was.

It never lasted long,, about two weeks or so, and looked like acme. I seemed to have about 4-5 episodes a year and now only once a year and very mild. I have been divorced since 1992, not because of herpes, and have had genital sex only twice since then.

The first women I met also had genital herpes and after four weeks of dating she told me that she had genital herpes, after which we had protected sex. After that relationship ended in friendship, an extremely difficult time in my life came about… I fell in love with another woman.
She and I were both forty years old and I fell madly in love with her. One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do was to tell her that I had herpes. Unfortunately for both of us, we did not realize how sick a person could get from this virus. She thought so little of this issue that her concern was that I did not speak the King’s English and would embarrass her in front of her friends. We both talked about it and I insisted that she talk to her doctor about it, since mine had advised me that my herpes was not that serious and
her chances of catching were slim. So, even after her doctor told not to have unprotected sex and to read the pamphlets on herpes, we did have unprotected
sex and she did get herpes.

Her life went to pieces in a matter of months. She is very ill and blames me
for taking her life away from her. I haven’t seen her since April, after returning from a two-week trip to Montreal and receiving a letter that described how I took her life and how much she hated me. That was the beginning of a depression that lasted many months and was rectified with therapy and taking an anti-depressant drug for six months. I had lost the one person that was so dear to me.
So now I’m very careful engaging with women, for I don’t think I could go
through that again, that is to hurt someone as I did her. I know now that we both made a bad decision when it came to having unprotected sex and her periodic letters will never let me forget that from her point of view it was all up to me to protect her from me, my virus.

Maybe someday I will be brave enough to date a woman for more then a few times and tell her about herpes. And to explain to her how bad it could get and that as a sexual partner with me, she probably would get herpes. Oh to meet and fall in love with a women that already has herpes Life would be so much easier.

Gender: M
Age: 41
City: Schaumburg
State: IL
Country: USA
# of Partners: 18


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