Talk About Herpes | Not a Bad Person

messed around when I was young, but never thought I would get this. Was married for almost two years and wanted OUT of the marriage. Decided to give it a nother shot. Notices something on his penis, but let it go. Went to have intercourse and it was soooo painful, I just could not do it. Few days later, felt cuts around my vaginal area. The doctor checked me out and came back. TOld me that I was "not a bad person" I was devastated. Husband told me that it did not matter because he would never leave me. Of course not, he was the MoFo that gave me this crap. I was in so much pain, could barely walk, cried non-stop. My sexual life was over. I absolutely hated my husbad after that. How could I ever have a good sexual relationship with somone again? I eventually had a baby via c-section and divorced this jerk. The two men that I have been with since seemed to be ok with the fact that I have hthis horrible disease. But i can tell that the intimatcy is not as intimate because it is lacking oral sex. The last guy I was with, is in his 20’s and I know that even though he accepts me, he is afraid of getting it. We always use protcetion, but one time while having sex he said: make sure the condom doesn`t come off! That was so painful when he said it, but I understand. I do not think that i would have accepted somone with Herpes. I have never told any of my friends. I am so ashamed., I still feel dirty and undesirable. I have gained weight and even when I tell myself that I am beautiful, I still feel dirty and undesirable. God how I hope they find a cure! Even though it does make me feel better that they guys I have been with since want me for me, I still feel that I am now "less than" and that they are settling…. [47028]

Gender: F
Age: 43
Married: N
State: NY
Country: US


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