Talk About Herpes | Weekly Outbreaks

I had a wonderful life…just had my first baby and had just gotten pregnant with another, and found a weird spot on my genital area. Went to my OBGYN and found out it was herpes. I had been faithful and I was devastated. At that time I was unaware that my husband had been playing around, but he has no visible signs or other signs…..devastated, I started asking and it finally come out about the playing around but he has no evidense of herpes, and denies giving it to me. We had had oral sex once or twice during this time and I guess that is when I was given it….no other way that I know…..but as far as fever blisters….I have never seen one on him…….. So I have SUFFERED with this horrible disease now for 24 years. You have told others to have positive thoughts….there are no postitive thoughts for this. In 1996, I had a hysterectomy and it seemed it did lesson the outbreaks. We relocated for his job, and then my Mother passed away…and that was total devastation in itself…We divorced and my mental status declined immensely. Over the years of feeling dirty and having to bleach everything I touch, and the feeling of knowing if others knew they would be afraid to come close or even touch and not ever good enough, has taken its toll on me……it has affected EVERY aspect of my life… I am having outbreaks it seems weekly. I haven`t been able to be sexually active in years, and that is so frustrating in itself. No insurance for me to get counseling or medical attention, or the medication I need to lesson the severity. I have been back with my ex-husband for almost 2 years now, we are not sexually active at all. So I am a financial burden for him and my family. Well I know that it seems as though I am whining……but this disease has cost me my life and all I was doing was being faithful to my husband. I am very bitter and just can`t seem to get past it. I hate herpes and what it has done to me and made me become!!! An emotional monster!!! [46826]

Gender: F
Age: 49
Married: N
State: Arkansas
Country: USA


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